Wizard Magazine founder Gareb Shamus has unveiled his latest project, and it’s going to change the entire world. It’s going to change history. And it’s going to change each and every one of us.
I’m not talking about FunFare, by the way. Yes, Wizard Entertainment issued a news release Monday announcing the upcoming launch of the new magazine about toys (for parents and kids, unlike Wizard’s ToyFare magazine, which was apparently for frat boys, given the intellectual level of several its features). Obviously, a new toy magazine is a minor cultural development and serves only as a curiosity, giving observers of the collectible industry pause since Wizard’s been struggling the past couple of years.
No, the amazing, life-altering, incredibly important development is this: Gareb Shamus has unlocked the secrets of time travel.
In the FunFare news release, Wizard includes the following statement:
“The Holiday Issue of FunFare launches at Big Apple Con on October 16, 2009 and features the Annual Holiday Hot Dozen List – #1 most quoted list in the media!”
It’s incredible: Shamus somehow knows that magazine that has yet to be published will be the most quoted source about popular toys in the mainstream media. If only he’d made this quantum discovery sooner, the world could have been spared this recession. We could have been spared the George W. Bush presidency. Hell, we could have been spared Heidi and Spencer on I’m a Celebrity, Get Me Outta Here!
Among the magazine’s inaugural features will be a list of the 100 hottest toys, toy histories and an all-ages spin on “ToyFare Theatre” dubbed “FunFare Theatre” (so creative).
It’s not the worst idea for a magazine; after all, it’s not as though there’s much in the way of competition for that niche market out there.
Unless of course you count the Sears Wish Book Holiday Catalog.