[The scene: a nondescript storefront in Small Town Main Street America.]
Man Off Street: Hi, I was wondering if I could use the can?
Recruitment Officer #1: Hi there! Welcome to the Civil War Recruitment Office.
Man: Um, hi. I really gotta take a whiz…
Recruitment Officer #1: I’m Happy Hogan, and this is Pepper Potts.
Recruitment Officer #2: Hi! I have freckles!
Man: Sure. They’re nice. You got a bathroom here or what?
Recruitment Officer #1: Absolutely! But first, why not fill out a form? Pepper’s got pens!
Recruitment Officer #2: I have blue ones and black ones, Happy! And I keep drugs in this one, just like the FBI guy on Prison Break!
Man: Who names people Happy and Pepper?
Recruitment Officer #2: Stan did! Are you finished with your form?
Man: What’s this for?